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A Letter to St. Nick
Ravens might steal Santa's job
Article by Bill from Hanover
Dear Saint Nick,
I want to say thank you, Santa, for leaving me the Big Ben Jersey, the Big Ben Baseball Hat and that great 25th Anniversary Terrible Towel! I hope you enjoyed the Primanti Brothers sandwich and the bottle of Iron City Beer (IC Light, of course) that I left for you.
But that's not the real reason I'm writing, Santa. You see, as much as I hate to be the one to tell you this, I think you oughta know... someone is trying to steal your job. That's right, Santa... your job has been outsourced to the Baltimore Ravens.
The First Gift
You see, Santa, those Baltimore Ravens are coming to the 'Burgh the day after Christmas. You may remember that they got lucky and beat us in Baltimore back on September 19th at that place down near the Inner Harbor that has a horrible odor coming off the water (aka, M&T Bank Stadium). But what you might not recall is the huge early Christmas gift they gave us that day when they knocked Tommy Maddox out of the game, opening the door for our young rookie QB to step in.
Big Ben has been nothing short of phenominal since that day of giving in Baltimore, energizing our entire team to a 12-game (and counting) winning streak. Granted, some of those wins have been a little to close for comfort, but this team has come together and Sunday's game in the 'Burgh is so very important. Which brings us to...
The Second Gift
What is on the line is simple, Santa. A win over Baltimore gives us home field advantage and a first round bye heading into the playoffs. Not only that, Santa... a win Sunday will also give some of our key starters a chance to rest and regain their energy before the quest for the Super Bowl starts in earnest a couple of weeks from now. You see, Santa, many of us have been waiting since 1980 for this special event, and beating Baltimore brings us inexhorably closer to our goal!
Surely, you see the threat to your livelihood, Santa. First, Baltimore gives us the gift of Big Ben. Next, they give us the gift of homefield advantage throughout the playoffs. How can you possibly compete with that? Unless, of course, you can give us...
The Greatest Gift
That's right, Santa. The Big One. The Game of all Games. The one all the Who's down in Who-ville have been anxiously awaiting for 25 long years. The Super Bowl.
Now, we're not asking for a hand out, mind you. That's not the Pittsburgh way. You just supply the plane tickets to Jacksonville... and let the Steelers do the rest. And when the Steelers finally earn that "One for the Thumb" in February, they'll give all the credit to you, Santa.
So you see... saving your job will be Pittsburgh's gift to you.
Yours truly in Yuletide cheer,
Bill from Hanover
P.S. -- Here are a few holiday game notes for you, Santa...
Those pesky Ravens have a record of 8-6 and are on the verge of being exterminated from playoff contention by the mighty, revitilzed Steel Curtain. I'm so glad to see that you left Ray-Ray and Jamal Lewis a huge lump of coal under their Christmas Tree, even though they are considered two of Baltimore's finest citizens (one takes a plea bargain to get out of a murder charge, and the other takes a plea bargain on cocaine charges... outstanding roll models for the inner city 'yutes of Baltimore, indeed!).
BTW, Santa... did you know that we never been swept in our history by the Ravens, and they have lost their last three games to us at home? Furthermore, the Ravens are 3-4 on the road while we are 7-0 at home.
And can you imagine that Coach Billick asked Kordell to give him advice on the Steelers? Kinda like asking Britney Spears for advice on rocket science, don't you think? In practice, they set both the defense and offense up to resemble our team. Let me ask you, Santa... what will this do? Kordell, please... just stick to punting the ball, okay!
Going into this grudge match, the Steelers will need to stop Baltimore's strong running game which consists of Lewis and Taylor. Throughout the last 12 games, our defense has shown that they are closing the lanes quickly, and playing very aggressive against the run. I just don't see us giving much up to such a one-dimensional offense. You can rest assured that Kyle Boller won't know what's coming as we change up our various blitz packges. Frankly, I wouldn't be surprised if things go so badly for Baltmore's offense that we see the return of Kordell. It has been alluded to in the Baltimore media that he might play. Perhaps Porter will lay the kind of hit on Kordell that he layed on Heap? OUCH! I think I would like to see that!
One thing is for certain... we will see a poised Ben Roethlisberger spread the ball around the field. He will not take many chances, but will explode if given the opportunity, particularly if Burress plays as expected. Ultimately, Ward and Bettis will prove to be the foundation of consistent yards gained, and we will win this game by at least 10.
Merry Christmas!
Mac & Wife is Hosted and Sponsored by Pittsburgh's Finest!
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